My Symphonie Fantastique

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entry May 1 2007, 11:07 PM
So far I've had three exams, am working on my take-home right now, and I still have two more tomorrow. After Thursday morning, it's unlikely that I'll be around for at least a week. Just found out that the hotel we're staying at is ridiculous and doesn't have free wireless, so unless I decide to go a Starbucks or some such other place, I probably won't be online for at least a week (time at home without my own computer+time in Florida). I definitely think it's a good time for me to pull away for a moment - this semester has been completely crazy.

There's some interesting things going on in various parts of my life. I'm currently single, but not if my other friends have anything to say about it. The three groups of friends that I hang out with (percussion people, vocal people, band people) all have various guys that they're trying to set me up with, which is rather humorous. Two go to this school, the other lives about an hour away. They all seem nice, I just think it's funny because I've never really let people set me up with anyone before. The whole guy thing has been a relatively touchy subject for me lately. My one serious relationship ended not so well (I broke up with him, he did some rather uncool things after that happened) and it makes me really hesitant to even consider entering another one. Trust is a big thing for me, and although I care rather easily, trust is hard to pry from me and yet amazingly easy to break. I'm also not completely content with who I am right now, knowing where I stand on certain things and what it is that I really want, and I'm not sure that I should really be engaging someone else in that while attempting to get just a basic understanding of myself. Although it would give me the basis to keep telling them "you just don't understand me!" Not fair to them though, so it's not something I want at this particular moment.

The other reason time away from the computer is good is because the doctors are pretty sure that I'm in the early/mid stages of carpal tunnel syndrome, which combined with the fact that I have tendonitis and am a percussionist means that I may have to undergo wrist surgery sometime soon - depending on how bad it gets, it could be a year, if I take really good care of it, hopefully never (although that's kind of unlikely unless I give up either the computer or playing, neither of which will happen soon).

I really don't know what else to write. I hesitate to turn this into a philosophical journal because most of my philosophies aren't quite as defined as I'd like them to be, and I don't want it to turn into a daily account of everything I do - I have other places for that, if I really desire such an escape, not to mention that it would bore all of you people. Once I come back from Florida, I'm hoping to transfer all of my SS-related blogs from other places to here, simply because otherwise I tend to forget about them and update them once a month or so, when there's a great deal of things that are going on. I'm really excited by the new people that come and then stick around, although there are a few things that have been irking me, but I think part of that is me being slightly annoyed by something, and then when I see it crop up (even though it's completely unrelated) getting more annoyed by it, which goes through a rather vicious cycle until I explode. And not in the fun esplodey-go-boom kind.

So I think I'm going to head off and make the family secret recipe fudge for my placement teacher and the school that I've been doing my work at, and then come back to attempt to finish up this take-home so I can start reading the material for the exam tomorrow that I have yet to look at it. smile.gif

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